A DISTINGUISHED Advocate of Republican Institutions was seen pickling his shins in the ocean.
"Why don't you come out on dry land?" said the Spectator. "What are you in there for?"
"Sir," replied the Distinguished Advocate of Republican Institutions, "a ship is expected, bearing His Majesty the King of the Fly-Speck Islands, and I wish to be the first to grasp the crowned hand."
"But," said the Spectator, "you said in your famous speech before the Society for the Prevention of the Protrusion of Nail Heads from Plank Sidewalks that Kings were blood-smeared oppressors and hell- bound loafers."
"My dear sir," said the Distinguished Advocate of Republican Institutions, without removing his eyes from the horizon, "you wander away into the strangest irrelevancies! I spoke of Kings in the abstract."
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The Blotted Escutcheon and the Soiled Ermine
The City of Political Distinction
The Highwayman and the Traveller
The Legislator and the Citizen
The Mine Owner and the Jackass
The Moral Principle and the Material Interest
The Party Manager and the Gentleman
The Politicians and the Plunder
The Return of the Representative