"WHAT a happy land you are!" said a Republican Form of Government to a Sovereign State. "Be good enough to lie still while I walk upon you, singing the praises of universal suffrage and descanting upon the blessings of civil and religious liberty. In the meantime you can relieve your feelings by cursing the one-man power and the effete monarchies of Europe."
"My public servants have been fools and rogues from the date of your accession to power," replied the State; "my legislative bodies, both State and municipal, are bands of thieves; my taxes are insupportable; my courts are corrupt; my cities are a disgrace to civilisation; my corporations have their hands at the throats of every private interest - all my affairs are in disorder and criminal confusion."
"That is all very true," said the Republican Form of Government, putting on its hobnail shoes; "but consider how I thrill you every Fourth of July."
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The Blotted Escutcheon and the Soiled Ermine
The City of Political Distinction
The Highwayman and the Traveller
The Legislator and the Citizen
The Mine Owner and the Jackass
The Moral Principle and the Material Interest
The Party Manager and the Gentleman
The Politicians and the Plunder
The Return of the Representative