Natasha was calmer but no happier. She not merely avoided all external forms of pleasure- balls, promenades, concerts, and theaters- but she never laughed without a sound of tears in her laughter. She could not sing. As soon as she began to laugh, or tried to sing by herself, tears choked her: tears of remorse, tears at the recollection of those pure times which could never return, tears of vexation that she should so uselessly have ruined her young life which might have been so happy. Laughter and singing in particular seemed to her like a blasphemy, in face of her sorrow. Without any need of self-restraint, no wish to coquet ever entered her head. She said and felt at that time that no man was more to her than Nastasya Ivanovna, the buffoon. Something stood sentinel within her and forbade her every joy. Besides, she had lost all the old interests of her carefree girlish life that had been so full of hope. The previous autumn, the hunting, "Uncle," and the Christmas holidays spent with Nicholas at Otradnoe were what she recalled oftenest and most painfully. What would she not have given to bring back even a single day of that time! But it was gone forever. Her presentiment at the time had not deceived her- that that state of freedom and readiness for any enjoyment would not return again. Yet it was necessary to live on.

It comforted her to reflect that she was not better as she had formerly imagined, but worse, much worse, than anybody else in the world. But this was not enough. She knew that, and asked herself, "What next?" But there was nothing to come. There was no joy in life, yet life was passing. Natasha apparently tried not to be a burden or a hindrance to anyone, but wanted nothing for herself. She kept away from everyone in the house and felt at ease only with her brother Petya. She liked to be with him better than with the others, and when alone with him she sometimes laughed. She hardly ever left the house and of those who came to see them was glad to see only one person, Pierre. It would have been impossible to treat her with more delicacy, greater care, and at the same time more seriously than did Count Bezukhov. Natasha unconsciously felt this delicacy and so found great pleasure in his society. But she was not even grateful to him for it; nothing good on Pierre's part seemed to her to be an effort, it seemed so natural for him to be kind to everyone that there was no merit in his kindness. Sometimes Natasha noticed embarrassment and awkwardness on his part in her presence, especially when he wanted to do something to please her, or feared that something they spoke of would awaken memories distressing to her. She noticed this and attributed it to his general kindness and shyness, which she imagined must be the same toward everyone as it was to her. After those involuntary words- that if he were free he would have asked on his knees for her hand and her love- uttered at a moment when she was so strongly agitated, Pierre never spoke to Natasha of his feelings; and it seemed plain to her that those words, which had then so comforted her, were spoken as all sorts of meaningless words are spoken to comfort a crying child. It was not because Pierre was a married man, but because Natasha felt very strongly with him that moral barrier the absence of which she had experienced with Kuragin that it never entered her head that the relations between him and herself could lead to love on her part, still less on his, or even to the kind of tender, self-conscious, romantic friendship between a man and a woman of which she had known several instances.

Before the end of the fast of St. Peter, Agrafena Ivanovna Belova, a country neighbor of the Rostovs, came to Moscow to pay her devotions at the shrines of the Moscow saints. She suggested that Natasha should fast and prepare for Holy Communion, and Natasha gladly welcomed the idea. Despite the doctor's orders that she should not go out early in the morning, Natasha insisted on fasting and preparing for the sacrament, not as they generally prepared for it in the Rostov family by attending three services in their own house, but as Agrafena Ivanovna did, by going to church every day for a week and not once missing Vespers, Matins, or Mass.

The countess was pleased with Natasha's zeal; after the poor results of the medical treatment, in the depths of her heart she hoped that prayer might help her daughter more than medicines and, though not without fear and concealing it from the doctor, she agreed to Natasha's wish and entrusted her to Belova. Agrafena Ivanovna used to come to wake Natasha at three in the morning, but generally found her already awake. She was afraid of being late for Matins. Hastily washing, and meekly putting on her shabbiest dress and an old mantilla, Natasha, shivering in the fresh air, went out into the deserted streets lit by the clear light of dawn. By Agrafena Ivanovna's advice Natasha prepared herself not in their own parish, but at a church where, according to the devout Agrafena Ivanovna, the priest was a man of very severe and lofty life. There were never many people in the church; Natasha always stood beside Belova in the customary place before an icon of the Blessed Virgin, let into the screen before the choir on the left side, and a feeling, new to her, of humility before something great and incomprehensible, seized her when at that unusual morning hour, gazing at the dark face of the Virgin illuminated by the candles burning before it and by the morning light falling from the window, she listened to the words of the service which she tried to follow with understanding. When she understood them her personal feeling became interwoven in the prayers with shades of its own. When she did not understand, it was sweeter still to think that the wish to understand everything is pride, that it is impossible to understand all, that it is only necessary to believe and to commit oneself to God, whom she felt guiding her soul at those moments. She crossed herself, bowed low, and when she did not understand, in horror at her own vileness, simply asked God to forgive her everything, everything, to have mercy upon her. The prayers to which she surrendered herself most of all were those of repentance. On her way home at an early hour when she met no one but bricklayers going to work or men sweeping the street, and everybody within the houses was still asleep, Natasha experienced a feeling new to her, a sense of the possibility of correcting her faults, the possibility of a new, clean life, and of happiness.

During the whole week she spent in this way, that feeling grew every day. And the happiness of taking communion, or "communing" as Agrafena Ivanovna, joyously playing with the word, called it, seemed to Natasha so great that she felt she should never live till that blessed Sunday.

But the happy day came, and on that memorable Sunday, when, dressed in white muslin, she returned home after communion, for the first time for many months she felt calm and not oppressed by the thought of the life that lay before her.

The doctor who came to see her that day ordered her to continue the powders he had prescribed a fortnight previously.

"She must certainly go on taking them morning and evening," said he, evidently sincerely satisfied with his success. "Only, please be particular about it.

"Be quite easy," he continued playfully, as he adroitly took the gold coin in his palm. "She will soon be singing and frolicking about. The last medicine has done her a very great deal of good. She has freshened up very much."

The countess, with a cheerful expression on her face, looked down at her nails and spat a little for luck as she returned to the drawing room.

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目录(365章)

Book One: 1805 - Chapter I

Book One: 1805 - Chapter II

Book One: 1805 - Chapter III

Book One: 1805 - Chapter IV

Book One: 1805 - Chapter V

Book One: 1805 - Chapter VI

Book One: 1805 - Chapter VII

Book One: 1805 - Chapter VIII

Book One: 1805 - Chapter IX

Book One: 1805 - Chapter X

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XI

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XII

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XIII

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XIV

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XV

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XVI

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XVII

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XVIII

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XIX

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XX

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XXI

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XXII

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XXIII

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XXIV

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XXV

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XXVI

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XXVII

Book One: 1805 - Chapter XXVIII

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter I

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter II

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter III

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter IV

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter V

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter VI

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter VII

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter VIII

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter IX

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter X

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XI

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XII

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XIII

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XIV

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XV

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XVI

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XVII

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XVIII

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XIX

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XX

Book Two: 1805 - Chapter XXI

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter I

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter II

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter III

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter IV

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter V

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter VI

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter VII

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter VIII

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter IX

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter X

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter XI

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter XII

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter XIII

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter XIV

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter XV

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter XVI

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter XVII

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter XVIII

Book Three: 1805 - Chapter XIX

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter I

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter II

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter III

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter IV

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter V

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter VI

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter VII

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter VIII

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter IX

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter X

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter XI

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter XII

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter XIII

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter XIV

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter XV

Book Four: 1806 - Chapter XVI

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter I

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter II

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter III

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter IV

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter V

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter VI

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter VII

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter VIII

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter IX

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter X

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XI

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XII

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XIII

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XIV

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XV

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XVI

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XVII

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XVIII

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XIX

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XX

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XXI

Book Five: 1806-07 - Chapter XXII

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter I

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter II

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter III

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter IV

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter V

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter VI

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter VII

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter VIII

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter IX

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter X

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XI

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XII

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XIII

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XIV

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XV

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XVI

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XVII

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XVIII

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XIX

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XX

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XXI

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XXII

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XXIII

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XXIV

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XXV

Book Six: 1808-10 - Chapter XXVI

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter I

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter II

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter III

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter IV

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter V

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter VI

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter VII

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter VIII

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter IX

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter X

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter XI

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter XII

Book Seven: 1810-11 - Chapter XIII

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter I

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter II

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter III

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter IV

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter V

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter VI

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter VII

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter VIII

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter IX

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter X

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XI

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XII

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XIII

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XIV

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XV

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XVI

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XVII

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XVIII

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XIX

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XX

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XXI

Book Eight: 1811-12 - Chapter XXII

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter I

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter II

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter III

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter IV

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter V

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter VI

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter VII

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter VIII

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter IX

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter X

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XI

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XII

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XIII

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XIV

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XV

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XVI

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XVII

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XVIII

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XIX

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XX

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XXI

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XXII

Book Nine: 1812 - Chapter XXIII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter I

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter II

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter III

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter IV

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter V

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter VI

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter VII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter VIII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter IX

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter X

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XI

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XIII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XIV

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XV

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XVI

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XVII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XVIII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XIX

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XX

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXI

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXIII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXIV

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXV

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXVI

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXVII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXVIII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXIX

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXX

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXXI

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXXII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXXIII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXXIV

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXXV

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXXVI

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXXVII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXXVIII

Book Ten: 1812 - Chapter XXXIX

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter I

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter II

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter III

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter IV

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter V

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter VI

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter VII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter VIII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter IX

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter X

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XI

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XIII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XIV

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XV

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XVI

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XVII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XVIII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XIX

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XX

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXI

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXIII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXIV

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXV

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXVI

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXVII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXVIII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXIX

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXX

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXXI

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXXII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXXIII

Book Eleven: 1812 - Chapter XXXIV

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter I

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter II

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter III

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter IV

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter V

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter VI

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter VII

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter VIII

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter IX

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter X

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter XI

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter XII

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter XIII

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter XIV

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter XV

Book Twelve: 1812 - Chapter XVI

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter I

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter II

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter III

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter IV

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter V

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter VI

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter VII

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter VIII

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter IX

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter X

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter XI

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter XII

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter XIII

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter XIV

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter XV

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter XVI

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter XVII

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter XVIII

Book Thirteen: 1812 - Chapter XIX

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter I

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter II

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter III

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter IV

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter V

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter VI

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter VII

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter VIII

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter IX

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter X

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter XI

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter XII

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter XIII

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter XIV

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter XV

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter XVI

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter XVII

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter XVIII

Book Fourteen: 1812 - Chapter XIX

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter I

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter II

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter III

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter IV

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter V

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter VI

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter VII

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter VIII

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter IX

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter X

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XI

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XII

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XIII

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XIV

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XV

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XVI

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XVII

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XVIII

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XIX

Book Fifteen: 1812-13 - Chapter XX

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter I

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter II

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter III

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter IV

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter V

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter VI

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter VII

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter VIII

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter IX

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter X

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter XI

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter XII

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter XIII

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter XIV

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter XV

First Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter XVI

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter I

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter II

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter III

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter IV

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter V

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter VI

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter VII

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter VIII

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter IX

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter X

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter XI

Second Epilogue: 1813-20 - Chapter XII